The inner critic, that annoying voice in your head that can sometimes feel like it’s just constantly squawking at you. It can make you feel like its constantly evaluating everything you do whilst reminding you of your faults and weaknesses, it can be a nasty pasty!!!
The inner critic judges you and it can undermine your self-confidence, it can use nasty words like your weird, your ugly, you are too fat and you are not good enough. It thinks in black and white; it focuses on problems and it doesn’t recognise or celebrate progress. Let’s use ‘you’re not good enough’ as an example, we all have this inner critic pop up at some stage in our lives. You are in a room with others, it might be a work function for example, you feel a little anxious, a little inferior to some people in the room, this is that nasty inner critic saying ‘you are not good enough’. What can I do about my inner critic you might ask? The answer is, you can disarm your inner critic, firstly you need to talk it down and then embrace it before you can completely silence it. This is a process that is most successful when facilitated by a trained therapist but there are some things you can do by yourself.
How does your inner critic speak to you, is it cold, is there a specific tone, is it sarcastic or just mean and nasty?
Try to notice what triggers the inner critic, what does it say, be curious and keep the perspective that the inner critic is just another part of you, it can be useful if you can avoid being hooked by its judgement.
When the inner critic is triggered and that annoying squawking voice is saying ‘you can’t, you are going to mess it up’ ask yourself;
Does this thought serve me? No, it doesn’t.
Is there a reason I should hold onto the thought? No, you don’t need to hold onto to it.
Who would I be without this thought? Clearly, I would be absolutely fabulous!
This small shift in thought by answering a few questions can sometimes be enough to silence the inner critic for a little while. There is very useful information in listening to an inner critic instead of trying to just drown it out. As I said earlier the most successful results will come from the help and guidance from an experienced therapist.