Services
Psychotherapy & Counselling
Therapy Sessions
Working with Teenagers, adults and families,
In person or on zoom,
Individual, couples and small group,
Rainbow friendly.
Here's a few of the Psychological Processes I work with.
Narcissistic Abuse
Why is it so difficult to recover from a narcisisstic relationship?
Emotional abuse resulting from a narcissistic relationship will take time to recover from, you need to rediscover yourself. The narcissist destroy their targets own identity, self worth and confidence.
Narcissistic abuse does not only cause emotional instability but it can also cause physical symptoms, sleep disruptions, headaches, muscle tension and stomach problems.
The constant gaslighting, false promises, eroded boundaries and cognitive dissonance will drive you to a point where you think that you are losing your mind and that you are the crazy one. You are not crazy, the narcissist has done this to you intentionally to control and destroy you.
Narcissist choose partners who can improve their status and the way people think and view them, they are predators! You are not silly or dumb for falling for a narcissist, you were chosen for your own remarkable qualities, you were tricked and groomed by the narcissist. You were lied to, tricked into thinking this relationship was magical, you were groomed and slowly lost pieces of yourself over time until you became a shell of the person you used to know.
How do I start Healing?
Understanding why you were open to being lured in by the narcissist, these parts of you have been with you the longest. For example, you have incredible empathy for others but not as much for yourself, you may be the peacekeeper in relationships, keeping the peace ranks higher then your own happiness. This is an unconscious process, an example of how it can present in your everyday life, ‘saying yes when you really want to say no’. This is why recovery is so much more than what we see as a “soul destroying relationship”, it can be a discovery and a healing like no other!!! This is where I can help you do your deepest and best work on yourself.
THE PEACEKEEPER ROLE
What is a peacekeeper?
Its a behavioral pattern, a suppression of your own desires to keep other happy or comfortable. Failing to set boundaries or maintain them, not confronting bad behavior. Being compliant to maintain the peace.
How do we become a peacekeeper?
Habitual avoidance of conflict and a desire to feel secure and accepted. Childhood conditioning possibly volatile caregivers from an early age.
How do we work on eliminating the peacekeeper role?
We start by recognising the pattern and setting boundaries. Gaining a deeper understanding the parts of yourself that are more comfortable in the peacekeeper role and how they have developed. Having an awareness of your go-to peacekeeper roles and situations and developing strategies to stop you taking on the peacekeeping role. Recognising your body symptoms when your about to enter the role, what feelings or physical symptoms occur.
What are the benefits of NOT being a peacekeeper?
An authentic feeling of peace and putting yourself first and feeling comfortable doing it. Improved rank in social, relationship and employment situations by taking back your power. To be a leader and not sitting on the fence and having the courage to say how you truly feel, an increased of self love. The possibilities are endless when we begin to understand who we are and how we got there…..
PTSD
There is a difference between PTSD and depression. One way to describe PTSD is; A medical illness, where individuals have trouble coping with their lives after experiencing some kind of trauma. The following is just a small sample of the symptoms of PTSD there are many more symptoms:
- Repeated and unwanted disturbing memories of the experience;
- Having strong physical reactions when reminded of the experience;
- Avoiding external reminders of the experience, people, places, objects and activities;
- Repeated disturbing dreams and/or flashbacks.
Grief
The emotional experience following a loss of a loved one is what most of us know grief as, but we can also describe grief as a loss of any kind, the loss of a job, relationship, house and status are a few examples and every person will have their own individual grief experience.
Some days grief is subtle, like water at the beach just lapping at your feet, you know its there but you can still get on with your day and feel okay and then others days it can feel like huge waves crashing over you head, completely immobilizing.
Night Dreams
Everyone dreams, some people will remember their dreams vividly and others may only remember a snippet of the dream.
Dreams are like little messages from your deeper self, to you from you.
Unfolding the meaning in your dreams can give you a greater understanding of the unconscious feelings trying to emerge that maybe having an affect on your everyday life, your everyday identity.